Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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