i think i have herpe
just one?
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
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