I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
