Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
