haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
