i think i have herpe
just one?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
