Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize