There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
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