4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
