love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize
