I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
