I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
