I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
When are your genitals available?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Randomize
