i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Randomize
