I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize