Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
