The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize