I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
