your room smells of hookers.
And success
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
