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So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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