Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
