you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
