i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
