Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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