At least make sure they are 18
Why
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Randomize
