That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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