There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
