Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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