Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Holy sore nipples Batman
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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