My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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