So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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