i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
