He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize
