So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
me + whiskey = a bad person
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
