I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
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