so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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