I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
