your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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