the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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