i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
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