Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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