So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize