I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
