i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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