No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Why are your pants in the freezer?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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