The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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