ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
There r osticjed everywhere
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Randomize
