put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
