I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
