Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
